Summer vacation season is upon us, and for many families receiving Cleveland ABA therapy services, this means one thing: extended family gatherings. Whether you’re planning a beach house reunion, attending a family wedding, or simply hosting grandparents for a longer visit, these occasions can bring both joy and anxiety for parents of children with developmental differences.

As an experienced multidisciplinary therapy team providing ABA, speech, and occupational therapy services, we at Therapy & Wellness Connection understand the unique challenges families face when navigating conversations about their child’s needs with extended family members. These conversations, while sometimes difficult, are crucial for building understanding, support, and creating positive experiences for everyone involved.

Why These Conversations Matter

Extended family members often have the best intentions but may lack understanding about your child’s specific needs, strengths, and the therapeutic approaches that work best. Without proper communication, well-meaning relatives might inadvertently create challenging situations or feel confused about how to interact with your child meaningfully.

Through our work in Cleveland ABA therapy, we’ve seen how transformative it can be when families successfully bridge this communication gap. When extended family members understand your child’s unique profile, they become powerful advocates and sources of support rather than sources of stress.

Preparing for the Conversation

Before diving into discussions about your child’s needs, take time to prepare thoughtfully. Consider your audience—a grandparent who sees your child monthly will need different information than a cousin who visits annually. Think about their current level of understanding, their relationship with your child, and their typical communication style.

Gather specific examples and success stories from your Cleveland ABA therapy sessions. Concrete examples are far more powerful than abstract explanations. Instead of saying “Sarah has sensory processing differences,” you might say “Sarah processes sounds differently, so she sometimes needs to wear her noise-reducing headphones in busy restaurants, just like someone might wear sunglasses in bright light.”

Leading with Strengths and Interests

One of the most effective strategies we recommend to families in our Cleveland ABA therapy program is to begin every conversation by highlighting your child’s strengths, interests, and recent accomplishments. This immediately frames the discussion in a positive light and helps family members see your child as a whole person rather than focusing solely on challenges.

Share specific victories from therapy sessions, school achievements, or moments of growth you’ve witnessed at home. Perhaps your child has been working on initiating conversations during speech therapy and successfully asked their teacher about weekend plans. Maybe they’ve mastered a new fine motor skill in occupational therapy that’s helping with independence at home. These success stories create a foundation of celebration and hope.

When family members understand what your child is passionate about—whether it’s trains, music, art, or animals—they have natural entry points for meaningful interactions. A uncle who learns about your child’s fascination with marine biology suddenly has endless conversation starters and gift ideas.

Explaining Needs with Clarity and Context

After establishing your child’s strengths, address their specific needs with clarity and context. Many extended family members benefit from understanding the “why” behind certain accommodations or strategies. Explain that the techniques you use aren’t arbitrary rules but evidence-based approaches developed through your Cleveland ABA therapy team’s expertise.

For example, if your child needs advance notice before transitions, explain that this isn’t about being “difficult” but about how their brain processes change differently. You might say, “Jamie processes transitions differently than some kids, so giving him a five-minute warning helps his brain prepare for the change. It’s like the difference between someone suddenly turning on bright lights versus gradually adjusting the dimmer switch.”

Be specific about what support looks like in practical terms. Instead of saying “Be patient with Emma,” try “Emma sometimes needs an extra 10-15 seconds to process what you’ve said before responding. If you wait a bit longer than usual, you’ll often get a wonderful response from her.”

Addressing Common Misconceptions

Unfortunately, misconceptions about developmental differences and therapeutic interventions still exist. Your Cleveland ABA therapy team at Therapy & Wellness Connection has likely helped you navigate these before, and the same principles apply with family members. Address misconceptions directly but compassionately, focusing on education rather than confrontation.

Some family members might believe that accommodations are “spoiling” your child or that they should “just act normal.” Gently explain that accommodations level the playing field rather than provide unfair advantages. You might compare it to wearing glasses—no one would suggest that someone with poor vision should “try harder” to see clearly without their corrective lenses.

Others might worry that acknowledging differences will somehow limit your child’s potential. Share how your Cleveland ABA therapy experience has shown that understanding and supporting differences actually maximizes potential by building on strengths and providing appropriate scaffolding for growth.

Creating Practical Guidelines for Interactions

Extended family members often want to help but don’t know how. Provide concrete, actionable guidelines that make interactions successful for everyone. These might include communication strategies, activity suggestions, or environmental modifications.

Share the successful approaches you’ve learned through your multidisciplinary therapy team. If your child responds well to visual schedules, show family members how to use simple picture cards or written lists. If certain sensory strategies from occupational therapy work well, explain how family members can incorporate these naturally.

Create a simple reference sheet with your child’s preferences, successful interaction strategies, and what to do if challenging moments arise. Include both the practical information and the reasoning behind it. For instance: “Alex does best with choices between two options rather than open-ended questions. Instead of ‘What do you want to do?’ try ‘Would you like to play outside or work on a puzzle?'”

Handling Resistance or Skepticism

Not every family member will immediately embrace or understand your child’s needs, despite your best efforts at communication. This can be particularly painful when it comes from people you love and want support from. Remember that resistance often stems from lack of understanding, generational differences in approaching developmental challenges, or their own feelings of uncertainty about how to help.

Our Cleveland ABA therapy team often reminds families that changing minds takes time, just like learning new skills takes time for children in therapy. Continue modeling positive interactions and celebrating your child’s successes. Sometimes the most skeptical family members become the strongest advocates once they witness your child’s capabilities firsthand.

If someone continues to be resistant or makes inappropriate comments, it’s perfectly acceptable to set boundaries. You might say, “I understand this is new information for you, and I’m happy to answer questions when you’re ready to learn more. For now, let’s focus on enjoying our time together.”

Leveraging Professional Resources

Don’t hesitate to involve your Cleveland ABA therapy team in these conversations when appropriate. Many family members respond well to professional perspective and expertise. Your therapists can provide family consultation sessions, recommend resources, or even speak directly with extended family members who have specific questions.

Consider sharing reputable articles, books, or videos that explain your child’s needs in accessible language. Your therapy team can recommend age-appropriate resources that align with your family’s specific situation. Sometimes information from a professional source carries weight that the same information from a parent might not.

Planning for Success During Visits

Once you’ve had initial conversations with extended family members, focus on setting everyone up for success during actual visits. Share your child’s daily routines and explain how to maintain consistency even in new environments. If your Cleveland ABA therapy team has helped you develop portable strategies for community outings, these same techniques apply to family visits.

Prepare a comfort kit with your child’s preferred sensory tools, favorite activities, and any items that provide security in new environments. Brief family members on your child’s current goals and how they can naturally support progress during interactions. This transforms visits from potentially stressful experiences into opportunities for generalization and practice in new settings.

Consider shorter visits initially, especially with family members who are still learning how to interact effectively with your child. Success builds on success, and positive short visits create foundation for longer, more complex gatherings in the future.

Building Long-Term Understanding and Support

The goal isn’t just to survive family gatherings but to build lasting understanding and support networks for your child. Share updates with extended family members about your child’s progress, new interests, and evolving needs. Send photos or videos of successful moments, therapy victories, or fun activities your child enjoys.

Help extended family members understand that supporting your child doesn’t require them to become experts in developmental differences or therapeutic techniques. Often, the most meaningful support comes from simply accepting your child as they are, celebrating their unique qualities, and maintaining loving relationships over time.

Regular communication helps prevent the awkwardness that can develop when family members see your child infrequently and aren’t sure how to interact. Brief phone calls, text message updates, or even short video calls can maintain connections between visits and help everyone feel more comfortable and confident.

The Ripple Effect of Understanding

When extended family members truly understand and support your child, the benefits extend far beyond individual interactions. Cousins learn acceptance and inclusion from their parents’ modeling. Grandparents share stories with their friends, spreading awareness in their communities. Family gatherings become celebrations of diversity rather than sources of anxiety.

Your Cleveland ABA therapy team has witnessed countless families transform their extended family dynamics through patient, persistent, and compassionate communication. These conversations require courage and energy, but they create lasting positive change for your child and your entire family system.

Moving Forward with Confidence

Remember that you are your child’s best advocate and most knowledgeable interpreter. Trust your instincts about what information to share, when to share it, and how to protect your child’s dignity throughout these conversations. Not every family member needs to know every detail, but every family member deserves the opportunity to build a meaningful relationship with your child.

Your multidisciplinary therapy team at Therapy & Wellness Connection, including our Cleveland ABA therapy providers, speech therapists, and occupational therapists, stands ready to support you through these conversations and any challenges that arise. We’re invested in your family’s success not just in therapy sessions but in all the environments where your child learns, grows, and builds relationships.

The summer season offers unique opportunities for extended family connection and understanding. With thoughtful preparation, clear communication, and patience, these gatherings can become sources of joy, support, and celebration for your child’s unique strengths and continued growth.

Therapy & Wellness Connection – your connection to a life without limitations – provides ABA therapy to children in Akron, Cleveland, Brecksville-Broadview Heights and surrounding communities. We also offer summer camp, day programs, education services, vocational counseling and more. Call us at (330) 748-4807 or send us an email.

Additional Resources:

Neurodivergent, Cleveland Clinic

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